i kinda noticed this when i was a kid, around that time in middle school when christmas lost its charm and i started getting bitter and critical about “kid stuff”, and now i’m bringing it back because it’s relevant:
hermey has round ears, not pointy ones like all the other elves.
the reason he can’t do elf stuff right is because he’s not an elf; he’s either a human child or perhaps a very short human man (which wouldn’t be a stretch, as i recall santa wasn’t much taller than the elves in this movie).
there’s a guy in one of my classes who i am secretly battling for dominance over by wearing awful hipster outfits. i dont know if he is thinking the same thing but regardless i intend to win
i thought i won today when i walked into class wearing my awful 1995 figure skating tour of the world (sponsored by campbells soup) t-shirt, mom jeans, and 1980 moscow olympics-theme denim jacket but then he had to walk in wearing a donald duck jacket with matching donald duck socks like what a fucking power move
i keep getting messages asking for updates on this
and i want you all to know that i just got back from our final class and this man really walked in wearing a fur coat, olive
green capris, sasquatch socks, and he inexplicably brought an entire roll of
wrapping paper to a 9:30am class. this combination easily defeated my comparatively
weak polka dot overalls. he has won and there is nothing i can do to redeem
myself
My boyfriend just woke up, mostly still asleep and told me “don’t worry, it’s getting better” in a heavy, American accent, which is unusual for an Australian man.
“Why are you American?” I asked, to which I got:
“Sorry, it’s getting better” in a stereotypical posh English accent.
“Why are you English?” I asked, amused.
“What is he normally?” He managed to ask.
“He? You’re not anyone else, you’re you.”
“Ugh, me” was the last thing he said, in a right proper Aussie accent before he fell back into proper sleep.
Bitch just thwarted a ghost possession by judging his accents
My boyfriend would be gettin’ hit with the baseball bat beside our bed if he ever woke up and said, “What is he normally?” about himself.
Then you would NOT have liked the time he pointed to a corner of our room while he was sleeping and said “they share a dimension with Earth and they take cats to eat them”.
